Despicable Freddy
by Shinigamilover2
Summary: 'Despicable Me' parody. Freddy Krueger is one of the world's most respected villains. When he adopts Clyde Donovan, Craig Tucker, and Damien Thorn, to use as pawns in his latest scheme, he begins to developing a fatherly bond with the boys and begins to love them like his own sons. Is it too late for Freddy to change? or will these three boys change all that? Please Read & Review?
1. Meet Freddy Krueger

** A/N: This is basically a parody of 'Despicable Me' with differed characters from popular movies and TV shows in the place of the main characters. And the character in Gru's place adopts sons instead of daughters. Now, let's meet our cast, shall we?**

** Freddy Krueger (A Nightmare on Elm Street remake) as Gru**

** Clyde Donovan (South Park) as Margo**

** Craig Tucker (South Park) as Edith**

** Damien Thorn (South Park version of character from 'The Omen' franchise) as Agnes**

** Bishop (Aliens) as Dr. Nefario**

** Amanda Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors) as Gru/Freddy's mother**

** Mogwai (Gremlins) as Gru/Freddy's minions**

** Ravage (Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen) as Kyle, Gru/Freddy's dog**

** Pyramid Head (Silent Hill: Revelation) as Fred, Gru/Freddy's neighbor**

** Norman Bates (Psycho) as Mr. Perkins**

** Ghostface (Scream franchise) as Vector**

** Sister Mary Eunice (American Horror Story: Asylum) as Miss Hattie**

** I know, most of them are from horror movies, except for the 'South Park' characters. But this is how I envisioned it when it came into my head. So, enjoy!**

All was peaceful in the town of Springwood, Ohio. A man was walking down the street. The man's face was burnt and some of his cheek was missing, so cheek muscles were shown through the missing pieces, he wore a black fedora, black pants, a red and green striped long-sleeved sweater, black shoes, and he wore a gardener's glove that had metal fingers with knife blades welded to the tips, and the metal fingers were connected to strips of metal that were connected to a metal ring that surrounded the waist of the glove tightly. The man's name was Freddy Krueger, one of the world's most feared super villains in the world.

"What a lovely day" Freddy said in his really deep voice that sent shivers down the spines of most of his victims. He even met a few people who crapped their pants when they heard him talk. Freddy looked down to see a little boy crying about dropping his ice cream on the sidewalk.

"Don't cry, little boy. Mr. Krueger's gonna make it all better" Freddy said gently. He pulled a balloon out his pocket and blew it up. Soon he bent it all twisty like to make a balloon animal of a dog.

"Here ya go" Freddy said. The boy stopped crying and hugged the balloon creature. Then, out of nowhere, Freddy took out his bladed index finger on his glove out and with a simply touch, the sharp blade popped the balloon in the boy's face.

"That's life, unfair. No go play in the street or something" Freddy said. Not caring that he hurt the little boy's feelings and walked away. He then looked up to see a 'Starbucks' sign on the side of a building. He shrugged his shoulders and licked his lips.

"I could go for some coffee" Freddy said. Once he turned around and got inside the store, there was a line of people. This irritated Freddy a LOT.

"God, I forgot how much I hate morning rush" Freddy muttered to himself. Freddy then spread his arms apart and using telekinesis, he made the people launch to the sides and then he walked up to the counter.

"Black coffee and a chocolate glazed doughnut please" Freddy said. The cashier nodded and worked on the burnt man's order. After a few minutes, she handed Freddy his coffee and doughnut.

"I believe this will cover it" Freddy said as he handed the cashier a ten dollar bill. He then took out his clawed hand in a fist and placed it over the tip jar and placed three dollars in quarters in the jar when he opened the fist up.

"Have a good one" Freddy said as he walked away with the bagged doughnut in his UN-gloved hand and his coffee in his clawed hand, being careful not to punch a hole in the cup with his knives.

"Y-You too, Mr. Krueger, sir" said the cashier as he exited. Freddy then walked to where he parked his car, a black Audi R8 with the red 'Monster Energy' logo on the hood and got in it. He placed his coffee in the cup holder, and then put the paper bag in the passenger seat right next to him.

"Now, let's see what's on the radio" Freddy said to himself as he took one bladed finger and used it to push a button on the radio. The song 'Leech' by Sevendust was playing.

"Oh, I love this song!" Freddy cheered. He then began singing along to the lyrics.

"To me it's cold! You can know what it's like to be alooooone! And all there is that you know, I'll be the one left here when you go!" Freddy sang as he rocked his head side to side and then he started the car up. The Audi then began making it's way to Freddy's home in the suburbs.

Freddy parked his car in the driveway of his house. Freddy's house was a simple white and green house with a red door on Elm Street. Freddy got out his car with his empty coffee cup in his bladed hand, and his doughnut in his other hand. Freddy went over to the garbage can that was sitting by the gutter and threw the cup in there.

"Hey there Freddy!" came a voice. Freddy looked to his left to see his neighbor, Pyramid head cutting his rose bushes. Pyramid head wore a giant metal triangle mask on his head, and a lone white toga.

"Hello, Pyramid head" Freddy growled silently so his neighbor wouldn't hear him.

"Just a little FYI. Your little keyboard operating dog had been taking craps on my grass and I am not happy about it" Freddy said irritatedly.

"Sorry, Freddy. But, you know how dogs are, they go wherever it is they want to" Pyramid head told him jokingly.

"Unless they're dead" Freddy replied, holding up his clawed glove, wiggling his fingers and the blades made swooshing sounds as they wiggled. Pyramid head just stood there silently. Freddy giggled a bit and put his glove down.

"Hehehehehe. Fooled you. True fact, though. Have a good one" Freddy said as he walked away into his house. Freddy took his glove off by loosening the wrist ring and placed it on the small table by his door. When he got to his living room, he saw that his 'Dog', a robotic looking jaguar named, Ravage was asleep on the couch.

"Ravage, you know you're not allowed on the sofa. Get off" Freddy gently commanded. Ravage woke up, stretched his legs and got onto the floor and faced the TV.

"Good boy" Freddy said as he sat down on the couch and took his doughnut out his bag and took a bite out of it and watched the 'Today Show' with Matt Lauer.

** DING DONG**

"Seriously?" Freddy said as he put his doughnut back in his paper bag and placed it on the coffee table. Freddy walked towards the door and put his bladed glove back on. He then looked through the peephole to see three boys.

"Hello! Cookies for sale" said the boy in the middle. The one in the middle was a ten-year-old who had pale white skin and brunette hair, he was wearing a red sweater that had a blue collar on it, gray pants, and black shoes. His name was Clyde.

The boy by his left was a seven-year-old too, and he had pale white skin too, only he wore a blue chullo with a little yellow puff-ball on top, a blue sweater with a dark blue collar, black pants, and black shoes. This boy's name was Craig.

The third boy on Clyde's right was five years old, his hair was black and he had pale white skin. He had on a black sweater, black pants, and black shoes. In his left hand he held a stuffed dragon with red scales, red wings, and red spikes that ran down it's back. This one was named Damien. These kids weren't related, but they were brothers by friendship and grown to care for each other no matter what.

"Go away, I'm not home" Freddy said. Clyde responded.

"Um, yeah you are. I just heard you" Clyde said. Craig then made a silly face and jumped up at the peephole, which made Freddy growl in disgust.

"No you didn't this... Is a recording" he said saying the last part like a robot with his deep voice.

"No it's not" Clyde argued.

"Yes it is" Freddy argued back with the deep robot voice. He then spoke again.

"Leave a message after the beep. Beeeeeeep" Freddy said again with his robotic voice. He then saw Craig kick the door and the door bumped Freddy on his shin.

"OW! Son of a burn victim!" Freddy cussed. Clyde and Craig left the door except for Damien.

"Goodbye, recorded message" Damien said with a squeaky voice.

"Damien, come on!" Clyde called out. Damien then followed his brothers away from Freddy's house. Freddy then moaned, took his glove off and placed it back on the table where it was and went back to the living room.

**A/N: How was that? I think Freddy Krueger would make a great Gru. And I decided to have Damien be into dragons, just like how Agnes is into unicorns. I hoped everyone liked it. I'll be sure to update this one as soon as possible. More to come in the next update. Please review, thanks!**


	2. Stealing the Moon & Sister Mary Eunice

** A/N: Now we know about Freddy Krueger, and the boys that tried to sell him the cookies, but Freddy just shooed them away from his front door. Now this is where we left off and we get to see some more of the characters. Enjoy!**

Freddy went back to the living room after dealing with the boys that were at his door and realized that Ravage was nowhere in sight.

"Hmph, I guess he went somewhere else" Freddy said to himself in his normal deep voice. He took his chocolate glazed doughnut and tried to take a bite out of it, but Ravage popped out of nowhere and pounced on him.

"Ravage, no! I told you that this is my doughnut! Besides, chocolate isn't good for alien robot... dog things. Get off!" Freddy commanded. But Ravage didn't listen and kept nuzzling Freddy's face while pounced on top of him. Freddy tried to get up, but Ravage was heavy and he couldn't get up.

"Freddy" came a voice. Freddy looked at the TV to see that the 'Today Show' wasn't on anymore, but it was a video-chat with his chief scientist, Bishop. Bishop was a cyborg built to serve Freddy, he had pale white skin, auburn hair, green eyes, a dark blue jumpsuit, a black belt, and combat boots. Since Bishop was a cyborg, he wouldn't die, he'd be immortal.

"Oh, Bishop. What a surprise. What's up?" asked Freddy as he gently pushed Ravage off, and Ravage complied and let Freddy get up.

"I know that you must be feeling very angry about this. But, I want you to know something; in my mechanical, non-aging eyes, you will always be one of the best villains the Earth has ever feared" Bishop said. Freddy got confused.

"Care to elaborate on that? Because I didn't understand a thing you just said, Bishop" Freddy said.

"It's all over the news. Some villain stole the pyramid. They're saying he makes all the other villains look... lame" Bishop said as he pushed a button and on the screen came a little small screen that showed the news report on the pyramid robbery in Egypt. Freddy began growling.

"Assemble the Mogwai! I'll be down in a minute!" Freddy ordered. He ran over to grab his glove and slipped it on, and tightened the wrist ring. Freddy then pushed a red button on his lounge chair with his index blade and out of the ground came a tube shaped elevator. Freddy got inside the elevator and it went straight down.

Meanwhile, Freddy paused the elevator to talk to one of his minions, a intelligent race of creatures that were similar to tiny monkeys only they had bigger ears, eyes, and their fur came in different patterns and colors.

"Gizmo! Assemble everyone! Emergency meeting!" Freddy instructed. Gizmo saluted Freddy and ran off to do what his master had told him to do. Freddy then proceeded to let the elevator bring him down. Once the elevator came to a complete stop, he walked down the hallway to see every single one of the Mogwai cheering for him.

"Thank you. You're too kind. And an amazing audience" Freddy said softly as he waved his clawed hand to the audience. Freddy then approached a microphone and tapped on it to make sure it was working.

"How are you doing today?" Freddy asked into the microphone. The Mogwai all cheered and shouted and then calmed down so their master could speak.

"Great. Anyways, I know everyone is rambling about this other guy who stole the pyramid. And that people are calling stuff like 'The crime of the century' and crap like that" Freddy said. The Mogwai began yelling 'Boo' in response to this.

"Calm down, calm down" Freddy said. As soon as they did, he continued.

"Now, am I upset about this. NO! And I know it's been a pretty rough year for the all of us. But you guys are all in my book!" he exclaimed. The Mogwai cheered. One was so happy be began talking to Freddy in his Mogwai language.

"Mika suuto moola?" asked the one Mogwai. Freddy giggled in his deep dark voice and spoke again.

"No, that doesn't mean you're getting raises. Sorry about that" Freddy apologized and then continued.

"We had some perks to this year too. What did we do? We stole the Times Square jumbotron!" Freddy said as he took out a remote and pointed it behind him to show a giant TV screen that he stole from Times Square in New York city. The Mogwai all cheered.

"Oh yeah, I bet you all like watching 'Walking Dead' on that, huh?" Freddy asked.

"But that's not all! We stole the statue of liberty!" he said as he pointed to his left. The Mogwai all cheered, but when the lights came on, it revealed that the statue was small.

"The small one from Las Vegas" the burnt man added.

"Awwwwwww" the Mogwai all whined.

"And I won't even mention the Eiffel Tower! Also from Vegas" said Freddy. After the Mogwai whined again, Freddy spoke again.

"Now, I wasn't gonna tell you about this yet. But, thanks to the help of my good friend, Bishop" Freddy said, pointing to Bishop in the audience with one of his claws. The Mogwai cheered and clapped for Bishop.

"Thank you. Thank you all" Bishop said softly. Freddy then continued.

"I have come up with a perfect idea that is gonna make the whole world forget about this pyramid heist. We are going to perform the TRUE crime of the century. We. Are going. To steal..." Freddy got them excited. The Mogwai got out weapons and other things, but Freddy spoke.

"Wait, wait! I didn't even say what it was yet!" Freddy exclaimed, trying to get them to put away their weapons before someone got hurt. One Mogwai that was holding a bazooka fired it by accident at a wall and some Mogwai screamed in terror. Freddy looked at the bazooka wielding Mogwai.

"Dave. Not cool" Freddy scolded with a growl.

"We are going to steal a special shrink ray from a secret lab in South Korea. Once we get it. We are going to steal... the moon!" Freddy said as he used the remote in his free hand to open up the sun roof to reveal the moon. The Mogwai began cheering for Freddy's genius idea.

"And once the moon is ours, people will be giving me whatever I want just to get it back!" Freddy said. He heard his iPhone ring and he took it out his pocket and answered it.

"Hello?" he asked. It was Bishop that was calling and he spoke from the other line.

"Freddy, I can't see how we can afford this! It's impossible. I'm a robot, not a miracle worker, you know" said Bishop. Freddy laughed a bit and then spoke.

"Cool your jets, Bishop. I'll just get another loan from the bank. They love me, remember?" Freddy said before hanging up and taking in the cheering the Mogwai were giving him.

Meanwhile, in the middle of the night, on the street were the three boys, Clyde, Craig, and Damien were walking. Craig was stomping around in the puddles by the gutter of the sidewalk, and Damien was holding Clyde's hand. Craig jumped in one puddle and some of the water splashed onto Clyde and Damien.

"Craig, stop it!" scolded Clyde.

"What? I'm just walking" Craig said as he put his hands behind his back and flipping him off without him knowing. The three of them arrived at their destination: 'Sister Mary Eunice's Home for Boys'. The three of them went into the building and stood at a desk.

"Hi, Sister Mary Eunice. We're back" the three of them said in unison. The office chair turned around to reveal a slender, pale white woman with blonde hair in a nun's suit. Her name was Mary Eunice, she ran the orphanage here.

"Hello boys" she said softly.

"Did anyone come do adopt us while we were out?" Damien asked in his normal squeaky voice.

"Let me think... NO!" she said, using a demonic voice when she said 'No'. Not only that, her iris' changed to orange, and the bulbar went black. She then blinked and her eyes were back to normal. The three boys flinched at her. Craig approached Mary Eunice's desk and placed some mud with a piece of grass in the center. Mary Eunice flinched in disgust and looked to the stoic boy.

"CRAIG! What did you put of my desk?" she asked, using her demon voice and demon eyes again to say his name.

"A mud pie" he said simply. Mary Eunice rubber her temples and sighed.

"You're never gonna get adopted, Craig. You know that, don't you?" she asked. Craig looked to his shoes sadly.

"I know" Craig said moving back towards his brothers.

"Anyways, did we make our quota today?" Mary Eunice asked, taking her hand off her face.

"Almost. We sold 43 mini-mints, 30 choco-swirlies, and 18 coco-nutties" Clyde said looking at his clip board. Mary Eunice got up from her desk and walked up to the boys.

"Now you say that like it's a great sale day... LOOK AT MY FACE! Do you still think IT'S A GREAT SALE DAY!?" she asked, using her demon voice and eyes in between and in the end of her sentence. The boys cringed in fright. They were deeply terrified of Mary Eunice since she abused them on a daily basis.

"I think we can do a little bit better than that. Don't you? Yeah, we wouldn't wanna spend the weekend in the box of shame now would we?" she asked.

"No, Sister Mary Eunice" they said in unison and sadness.

"Good, now go to bed. It's late" she instructed. The three boys sadly did as they were told. Dear God did they hate that woman so much. She was literally the devil in a woman's body.

**A/N: This chapter seemed a bit longer than the others, didn't it? That's good. Freddy plans to steal the moon with the help of the Mogwai (From the 'Gremlins' movies) and Sister Mary Eunice (Hot possessed nun from 'American Horror Story: Asylum') is in the place of the wicked Miss Hattie. And Bishop (Our favorite cyborg from 'Aliens') is Dr. Nefario. Lots more to come in the next update. Please review, thanks!**


	3. Ghostface

** A/N: Now we know what Freddy's master plan is. We got to meet the Mogwai, Bishop, and Sister Mary Eunice (The Devil in a woman's body). We also saw how bad she treated Clyde, Craig, and Damien. Now we continue where we left off. Enjoy!**

Freddy drove down the road to the bank in his black Audi. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and he used the hand that wasn't clawed to take the phone out his pocket and look to see who was calling. It was his mother, Amanda Krueger. Freddy pressed the 'Answer' button and held the phone up to his head.

"Hello mom. I've been meaning to call you. I just haven't had the time" Freddy excused. His mother spoke from the other end.

"I just wanted to congratulate you on stealing the pyramid. What was YOU, wasn't it? Or was it a villain that's actually successful?" she asked with a small laugh at the end. Freddy groaned and snarled, but then had his tone return to normal when he spoke to his mother.

"Just to let you know, I am about to do something VERY big. And you will be very proud once I've finished it" Freddy said. His mother scoffed and spoke.

"Ha, good luck with that. Okay, gotta go" she said before hanging up. Freddy then heard a dial tone and he growled putting the phone back into his pocket.

"Mothers" he growled as he parked his car. Freddy then got out holding a briefcase and some blue-prints in his arms and gloved hand. Freddy went straight for the men's restroom when he got into the bank building. When he got to a urinal, he pressed a button with his index bladed finger and out of the wall came a black orb. Freddy opened up his eye as wide as he could and a tiny red laser scanned his eyeball.

"Welcome, Freddy Krueger" said a machine voice as the bathroom wall opened up to reveal a hallway with red surrounding it and he went inside. Once he got to the front desk, he spoke with his dark voice.

"Hello. Um, Freddy Krueger to see Mr. Bates?" he asked. The woman at the front desk looked away from her tabloid and looked to Freddy.

"Take a seat, he'll be with you in a minute" said the receptionist. He did as she said and sat down on the red leather couch. Freddy opened up a blue-print and read it as he waited. Flashbacks of his childhood reminded him of how much he wanted to go to the moon, but his mother crushed his dreams when she told him that NASA stopped sending primates as test subjects. A tear slipped from Freddy's eye and he wiped it away with the thumb of his glove that had no blade on it.

"Yo" he heard a voice say. Freddy looked to the other couch to see someone wearing a black cloak with the hood up, and a ghost mask. The figure walked up and sat down next to Freddy, which made him very irritated.

"I'm here to apply for a new villain loan. I go by the name 'Ghostface'!" he said in a nasally voice that would make a teenage girl scared because the voice sounded like it belonged to a stalker or something. Freddy backed away from Ghostface a bit, but Ghostface kept getting into Freddy's face.

"See, because my face is a ghost mask, and the mask is scary. I've scared a few people with this mask a few times" said the annoying masked villain. Freddy growled and moved couches. This didn't stop Ghostface, though. In a minute, Ghostface walked right up to Freddy with a pristine white gun in his hand.

"Check this out. Piranha gun! It fires real life piranhas! Pretty cool right?" Ghostface asked as he showed off the device to Freddy. Freddy just growled and buried his face in the blue-print. Ghostface fired a piranha out of the gun and it landed on the floor. He tried to put it back in, but the fist was too slippery and kept resisting.

"Mr. Krueger, Mr. Bates will see you now" said the receptionist.

"Finally" Freddy said deeply as he got up from his seat and walked up to the office of Norman Bates, the owner of the bank.

After an hour and a half of explaining things to Norman Bates, a tall man who was pale, had an Elvis style cut, a dark blue button up shirt, brown pants, and he had an apple in his hand, and a butcher knife on his desk.

"And once the moon is ours, I can guarantee you this, Mr. Bates... the world will be bending before us" Freddy said, clenching his clawed hand into a clawed fist. Norman was impressed with what Freddy had going on.

"Very impressive, Mr. Krueger. I'd very much like to see this 'Shrink Ray'" he said. Freddy then got nervous.

"Indeed. As soon as I get it" he told him. Big mistake.

"You DON'T have it? And yet you have the audacity to ask the bank for money?" asked Norman irritatedly.

"Um... yeah" Freddy said as he put his head down in humiliation. Norman then got up from his desk, and took up the butcher knife from his desk into his hand.

"Freddy, let me tell you something. Let's say this apple is you" Norman said as he placed the apple on the desk.

"Continue" Freddy said.

"If the bank doesn't start getting it's money back..." he lunged the butcher knife through the apple and sliced it in half. Freddy snarled at how Norman was lecturing him instead of giving him the money.

"Get the picture?" asked Norman. Freddy just nodded and growled. Norman then sat back down at his desk and spoke.

"Truth be told, Krueger, there are a lot of new villains out there who are much better than you. Like that young fellow out there named Ghostface. He stole a pyramid" Norman said. Freddy then realized something, it was GHOSTFACE that stole the pyramid.

"I'll have to give that little punk a piece of my mind whenever I have some time" Freddy thought to himself.

"Okay... I got it. Anyways, about getting money for the rocket?" asked Freddy.

"Get the shrink ray, then we'll talk" said Norman. Freddy just grabbed his things and left the office. Before leaving the lobby, Freddy looked to Ghostface and extended his middle finger on his clawed glove and then left.

"No one flips me off and gets away with it" Ghostface muttered bitterly.

Freddy was now flying over South Korea with his jet, and in the cockpit with him were two Mogwai.

"Approaching target. Get ready to go down" Freddy said to a Mogwai who was about to operate a mechanical claw with a control panel and chair on it. As soon as the plane was over the building, the robot arm was lowered and a special laser was fired to blow a hole in the building roof. The claw grabbed the shrink ray and the Mogwai taunted the lab workers.

"Ahahahahaha! Suckers!" the Mogwai said before banging his head on the ceiling by accident.

"Suckers" said the Mogwai before hitting the ceiling again, but then finally getting into the jet and flying away. Freddy looked behind him to see the one Mogwai holding the shrink ray and putting in a special compartment.

"Yes! No one can outsmart Freddy Krueger!" he shouted before he saw a hole being blown in the plane roof, and another robotic claw taking the shrink ray. Freddy looked to his side to see another ship, and it belonged to Ghostface.

"Maybe next time you'll think twice about flipping someone off with a knived finger! So long Krueger!" Ghostface said before flying ahead of Freddy's jet.

"Oh no you don't you little psycho villain wannabe!" Freddy snarled before he began flying after him. Freddy pressed a button with his index knife and fired every single bullet, missile and nuke he could at him.

"Let's see him try to fly his way outta this" Freddy taunted playfully. He then saw Ghostface let out scrap metal out the back of his ship and the projectiles blew those up instead of the ship.

"Seriously!?" Freddy shouted. Then he saw Ghostface on the roof of his ship holding the shrink ray in his hands. He fired a beam at the jet Freddy was piloting. Soon, the ship was shrunk and Freddy was flying a little jet that was small enough to be a remote control toy, and the Mogwai were on his shoulders.

"I hate that guy" Freddy snarled when he saw Ghostface's jet flying away.

"I'll get you next time you little son of a burn victim" the burnt human snarled. Using the tiny jet, he began making his way home.

**A/N: There you have it! Ghostface is officially number one on Freddy Krueger's hit list. And I felt like Norman Bates was a perfect Mr. Perkins parable, because without him or Leatherface (Texas Chainsaw Massacre) there would be no slasher genre in the horror movie category. In the next update, we check up on the boys and see Freddy try to get the shrink ray back from Ghostface. Please review, thanks!**


	4. Freddy's New Plan

** A/N: In the last chapter, Freddy met Ghostface and he got the shrink ray stolen from him after he stole it. Not only that, Ghostface shrunk his plane and now Freddy is gonna do all he can to get it back. We'll also see more of Clyde, Craig, and Damien in this chapter. Enjoy!**

It was night at Sister Mary Eunice's home for boys, Clyde, Craig, and Damien were in their pajamas, on their knees, hands together, and prayed.

"And bless that you'll watch over us. And bless that we'll have a good night's sleep" Clyde said. Craig was the next to speak in the prayer.

"And bless that no bugs will crawl into our ears and lay eggs in our brains" Craig joked in Damien's face. Clyde groaned in irritation and spoke.

"Thank you... for that image... Craig" said Clyde. Damien prayed next.

"And please bless us that we'll be adopted soon, and that the mother and father will be nice. And bless that they'll have a pet dragon" said Damien. Clyde and Craig opened their eyes and looked over to Damien like he was crazy. They then just spoke to end the prayer.

"Amen" they all said. Clyde got into his bed on the left, Craig in the middle, and Damien on the right. Clyde shut the lights off and just as he and Craig were about to fall asleep, they heard Damien singing as he played with his stuffed dragon.

"Dragons, I love them. Dragons, I love them. Drago-drago-dragons, I looove them" the black haired child sang. Clyde and Craig groaned and tossed and turned as they tried to sleep.

"Dear lord" Craig said as he placed a pillow over his ears to block out Damien's singing. Clyde plugged his ears with his index fingers.

"Damien, please shut up" Clyde muttered silently. Damien didn't hear and kept singing.

"Drago-Dragons I could pet one if they were really real. And they are. So I bought one so I could pet it. And it loves me, and I love it" it was clearly a long night for them. The minute they knew it, Damien's annoying singing actually lulled them to sleep.

The morning after, Freddy disguised himself as a hipster, with beanie with fake dread locks attached to it on his head to cover up his burnt face with the fake locks. He also wore a long sleeved tie-dye shirt, and acid wash skinny jeans. He walked up to a large dome shaped fortress that was white. It was the lair of Ghostface.

"Like anyone doesn't notice that" Freddy said when he saw the pyramid painted blue with white clouds on it like a sky. Freddy then took out a pen, pressed the top and the pen turned into a periscope and it looked into the fortress. Little did he know Ghostface saw everything with a camera, and he pressed a button, making the periscope explode.

"Dang it!" shouted Freddy.

The next attempt, Freddy wore his normal clothes and his hat and clawed glove. And he tried doing a javelin over the fence, and it resulted him getting tazed in the nuts by a tazer gun, and Krueger fell off the fence.

"Ow!" Freddy exclaimed.

Freddy then tried entering through the sewer, but a mutant shark/god ran after him when he opened up the man-hole.

"Son of a burn victim!" Freddy swore as he ran away.

The next time, Freddy decided to be polite knocked on the door. Right after he knocked on the door, missiles and guns came out of the top of the dome and aimed at Freddy with their lasers.

"Crap" Freddy muttered before getting blown into a crater and living. Good thing his immortality came from dream demons which were also immortal. When Freddy crawled out of the crater, he noticed Clyde, Craig, and Damien try to get in.

"Hehehehehe. Good luck little boys" Freddy smiled evilly and chuckled. He pulled out binoculars and looked at everything that was happening. He saw the logo 'Sister Mary Eunice's Home for Boys' on the clipboard that Clyde was holding.

When Clyde rang the doorbell, the same guns came out of the top of the dome and pointed at the three boys.

"Woah!" shouted Craig.

"What do you want!?" Ghostface said through the intercom.

"Um, we are orphans from Sister Mary Eunice's Home for Boys" Clyde began, but Ghostface cut him off on intercom.

"I don't care! Go away!" shouted Ghostface.

"Oh come on. We're selling cookies, so that we... you know, have a better future" explained Clyde.

"Oh, wait, wait, wait. Do you have coco-nutties?" asked Ghostface.

"Yeah" Clyde said plainly.

"Come right in" said the voice on the intercom. The guns were put away, and the gates were opened up. The three boys went inside and Freddy couldn't imagine what he just saw. Ghostface let three boys into his lair.

"Light-bulb" Freddy said as he hatched an idea in his brain. Freddy took his iPhone out and clicked 'Bishop' from his speed dial. The contact photo showed Bishop in a speedo, flexing in front of a mirror. Freddy turned away from the phone screen and snarled.

"I'll have to remind myself to delete that photo" he said to himself.

"Hello?" Bishop's voice said from the other line of the phone. Freddy then spoke up.

"Bishop. I'll need you do make a dozen robots disguised as cookies" Freddy ordered.

"I'm sorry, I have a bad signal. Loogies?" asked the cyborg.

"No, Cookies! Oh dear god!" Freddy shouted before hanging up. Freddy then put his phone away and lathered his non-bladed hand, and bladed hand together.

"This is the best idea I've ever had in my life" said Freddy.

**A/N: So, Freddy has a plan to get the shrink ray back, and it involves Clyde, Craig, and Damien, the three innocent boys who tried to sell him cookies before in the first chapter. Now, Freddy Krueger's genius plan gets put into action in the next update! Please review, thanks!**


	5. Adopting Clyde, Craig, and Damien

** A/N: Now is the time for Freddy to put his master plan into effect in this chapter where he finds himself going to 'Sister Mary Eunice's Home for Boys' to adopt Clyde, Craig, and Damien. Hope it works, and enjoy!**

Freddy sat in the lobby of Sister Mary Eunice's orphanage wearing gauze around his head to cover up his burnt face, he also was wearing a hospital gown, and he didn't have his bladed glove on, he left that and his hat in his Audi.

"Well, it appears you have passed our background check, Doctor Krueger" Sister Mary Eunice said as she looked at the screen of her Apple laptop. Freddy shifted in his seat a bit and just kept looking forward.

"Oh, and I see you have made a list of some of your personal achievements. Thank you for that, I love reading" Mary Eunice said with sarcasm at the end of her sentence.

Back at Freddy's underground base, one of the Mogwai was sitting at a computer and typed up the personal achievements list by hacking into the orphanage's mainframe.

Mary Eunice read the achievements aloud to herself.

"I can see that you've been given the medal of honor and you were knighted by the Queen of England herself" she said. Freddy just decided to nod and go along with everything the Mogwai typed.

"You had your own cooking show. And you can hold your breath for thirty seconds. Not all that impressive" said the woman. Freddy just rolled his eyes at the last part. He would have to remind himself to lecture that one Mogwai on writing ridiculous crap on his profile whenever something like this happens again.

Back at the base, two Mogwai were fighting over who got to type on the computer. The first Mogwai ended up bashing the second Mogwai's face into the keyboard.

On Sister Mary Eunice's laptop, lots of numbers, symbols, letters, and logos appeared on her screen.

"What in the name of... what the heck?" she asked herself, squinting her eyes. Freddy then decided it would be better off if he spoke for himself and convince this woman to let him adopt.

"Okay, here's the thing. You see this?" asked Freddy, pointing to his bandages. She just nodded, and Freddy spoke back.

"It's been about a week since my wife, Nancy and I were caught in this huge house fire that nearly took all our lives. I woke up in the hospital and the doctor told me that I was the only one who survived the fire and that my wife was taken from me. It's like my heart is a took, and it has a cavity. And it can only be filled with kids" Freddy said, burying his bandaged head.

"Ow" Freddy faked when he put his hands on his face. He was a burn victim, but it was a while ago, and not recently. He knew because being burnt alive really hurt. He then looked up to see Mary Eunice's expression was blank, so Freddy decided to fake flirt with her.

"You are a beautiful woman, do you speak Spanish?" Freddy asked.

"Do I look like I speak Spanish, Mr. Krueger?" she asked. Freddy then began speaking in Spanish like he knew what he was saying.

"You have a face como un burro" he said. Mary Eunice began to blush and get a smile.

"Oh, my. Well, thank you" she said. They both giggled together. She didn't care that his deep voice was scaring her, she just only cared that his comment made her day.

"So, um... anyways. Can we please proceed with the adoption? I'm so excited" Freddy said, trying to change the subject. Mary Eunice giggled and pressed a button on the intercom and spoke into the microphone.

"Please tell Clyde, Craig, and Damien to come to the lobby" she said.

Upstairs, Clyde, Craig, and Damien ran into their rooms and packed their things up.

"I bet the mother is beautiful!" Clyde cheered.

"I bet the father's eyes sparkle" said Craig as he put their piggy bank in Clyde's bag.

"I bet their house is made of skittles" Damien piped in. Clyde and Craig looked to their younger brother with odd looks.

"I'm just saying that it would be nice" said Damien as he picked his stuffed dragon off his bed and picked up an orange puff from the floor.

"Aw man, my snake egg never hatched into a snake" said Damien sadly.

"That's a Cheeto" said Craig. Damien just shrugged his shoulders and ate it. The other two boys looked at the younger one with looks of disgust.

Back downstairs, Mary Eunice continued talking to Freddy.

"Well, Nancy was a very lucky woman" said the nun. Freddy looked confused.

"Who's Nancy?" he asked.

"Your wife" she reminded. A door opened behind them and Freddy looked behind him to see the three boys from his house and Ghostface's fortress.

"Oh, hello boys" Sister Mary Eunice greeted. Freddy stood up from his chair and looked down at the boys. Craig's jaw was agape, while Clyde and Damien's weren't.

"Boys, I want you to meet Mr. Freddy Krueger. He's going to adopt you. And he's a dentist" she cooed at the last part of her sentence. Clyde looked to see Craig with his jaw hanging low and he nudged the blue clad boy to get him to stop and he did. Damien ran up to Freddy and grabbed his leg and laughed playfully.

"Um, hi. I'm Clyde" said the brunette boy awkwardly. He spotted Craig trying to walk away slowly but grabbed his arm and held him in front of Freddy.

"This is Craig" he said.

"And that's Damien" Clyde pointed to Freddy's leg. He tried shaking his leg, but Damien wouldn't let go. This kid was like a monkey. Sister Mary Eunice laughed at the sight of this. Freddy just moaned and just looked to Clyde and Craig.

"Come on boys" Freddy said as he took their bags into his hands. Damien rode on Freddy's leg to the Audi, and the two other boys followed. Freddy then placed the bags in the trunk and guided the boys to the back seat.

"Nice car you've got" Clyde complimented.

"Thank you. I won it in a raffle, and I customized it myself" Freddy said. He shut the back door. And took off the hospital gown to reveal his red and green striped sweater, and he took off his bandages as well to reveal his burnt face and his cheek muscles that were showing from the missing skin. The boys were watching him through the window.

"Oh my God, ew" said Craig as he saw Freddy's real face. Freddy then got into the car and put his hat on and put his glove on, and tightened the wrist ring and wiggled the knives. The boys gulped at the sight of the knives.

"Let's go" he said as he started the car and began driving home to Elm Street.

**A/N: There you have it! Freddy has guardianship of Clyde, Craig, and Damien. And he didn't know what he said to Mary Eunice because he doesn't speak Spanish, hahaha! Also, the name of Freddy's imaginary wife 'Nancy' is a reference to 'Nightmare on Elm Street', because in the movie, Nancy was Freddy's favorite before he was burned alive. More to come in the next update! Please review, thanks!**


	6. New Home & Ground Rules

** A/N: Clyde, Craig, and Damien were adopted by Freddy in the last chapter. Now this is where the boys see Freddy's home and, well, you should know if you've already seen 'Despicable Me'. Enjoy!**

In Ghostface's fortress, Ghostface was playing around with the Shrink Ray in his bathroom. He kept admiring himself as he made poses in the mirror, holding the device in his arms.

"What are you looking at... punk?" Ghostface asked a bottle of mouthwash before pulling the trigger and shrinking it.

"You got shrunk, tiny mouthwash!" Ghostface exclaimed before shrinking the sink too. The phone in his cloak then rang.

**I always feel like... somebody's watching meeeeee! And I've got no privacy! Oh, woooooaaaaah!**

Ghostface picked the phone up.

"Hello?" Ghostface asked.

"Did you get it?" asked the deep voice on the other line.

"Oh yeah, I've got the shrink ray" Ghostface said.

"Are you playing with it? If you are... quit being irresponsible" said the other voice.

"No, I'm not... playing with it" Ghostface lied.

"And what of Freddy? What are we going to do about him?" asked the voice.

"Krueger? Hahahahahahaha! Don't make me laugh. P.S. He's not getting THE MOON. And P.P.S. By the time I'm done with that bug-bit puffed up prune face, he's gonna be begging for mercy" Ghostface said before firing another beam from the Shrink Ray and it shrunk his pristine white toilet.

"Okay, bye" Ghostface said before pressing the 'End Call' button and got on his knees to the miniature toilet.

"Oh, look at you. A little tiny toilet. A tiny little baby toi..." Ghostface cooed before the mini toilet began shooting water at his mask.

"Aaaah! Curse you, tiny toilet!" shouted Ghostface as he put his hands in front of the water stream that was shooting at him.

Meanwhile, Freddy let the boys out the Audi and they stood in front of Freddy's house on Elm Street.

"Here we are, home sweet home" Freddy said before picking up a newspaper on his front steps.

"So, this is like your house?" Clyde asked. Freddy didn't respond.

"Wait a minute... YOU'RE the guy who pretended he was a recorded message!" Clyde accused Freddy.

"No, that was some other idiot who I will probably never let into my house or answer my door again" Freddy answered emotionless as he took the keys out his pocket and opened up the door. When it was opened, Freddy let the boys go in first. They were looking all around the Krueger residence to see a bunch of gloves like the one Freddy had on, only on the fingers were spoons, forks, syringe needles, mini-chainsaw blades, and wire-whisks on black display hands on the shelves.

"Can I hold your hand?" Damien asked as he reached his hand out for Freddy's clawed one.

"No" Freddy growled as he walked forward. The boys looked around some more to see horror movie posters for various slasher films. On top of the fireplace was a lion head with a dog in it's mouth, and in the dog's mouth was a kitten.

"When we got adopted by a bald guy who had burn scars all over his face, I thought this would be more like a gender-bent version of 'Annie'" said Craig after taking another sip of a juice-box he held in his hand.

When the four of them entered the living room, Ravage was standing there and he thought the boys were intruders in the house. Ravage snarled and ran towards the boys, but Freddy got in front of him and began hitting his head with the newspaper from the front. Ravage bit off half of the paper and Freddy hid behind the boys.

"Ravage, these are not treats, these are guests" Freddy said. He then looked down to the boys.

"Clyde, Craig, Damien, this is Ravage, my... dog" Freddy said. Ravage responded by snarling.

"Oh cool, a dog!" Damien cheered. Damien slowly approached Ravage only for Ravage to freak out and run away.

"Aw" Damien whined. Clyde then looked up to Freddy.

"What kind of dog is that?" asked Clyde.

"He's a... to be honest, I don't really know. He just crash landed in my backyard one day and now he's my house pet" the burnt man explained. Craig wandered off on his own to see a coffin with two doors and spikes on the inside. The blue clad boy got inside and Freddy noticed.

"No! Stay away from that, it's fragile!" Freddy scolded. The doors closed and dark red liquid leaked from the bottom of the doors. Clyde and Damien gasped in shock, believing Craig was dead.

"Well, I suppose the plan will work with just two" Freddy said before hearing a voice.

"Hey, it's dark in here!" the voice belonged to Craig. He was alive. Freddy opened the twin doors up to see Craig still in one piece with his juice-box on one of the spikes.

"It poked a hole in my juice-box" Craig complained. Clyde and Damien gave stern looks to their new father. Freddy just face palmed himself with the hand that didn't have a glove on it.

He lead the boys to the kitchen and placed the newspaper flat on the floor next to a bowl of water and a bowl filled with candy.

"As you can see, I have provided everything a child might need" Freddy told them. Craig then reached for a jar filled with eye-balls and made it fall of the counter and it broke as it hit the floor.

"What did... oh my God! Son of a burn victim! Grrrrr!" Freddy said with a snarl at the end of his sentence.

"Somebody broke that" Craig said innocently, which he was faking.

"Okay, okay. It seems pretty clear to me that we need to set SOME rules" Freddy said.

"Rule number one, you will not touch ANYTHING!" Freddy specifically told the three boys.

"Uh-huh. What about the floor?" Clyde asked.

"Yes you may touch the floor" Freddy responded.

"What about the air?" Clyde asked once more.

"Yes, you may touch the air" Freddy said annoyed.

"What about this?" asked Craig as he revealed he was wearing one of Freddy's gloves. It was painted to look like muscle tissue, there was a knife on the thumb, and there were red tubes attached to each finger to go down the wrist on the back of the glove like veins and arteries. Freddy got mad the minute he saw Craig wearing it.

"Where did you even get that thing!?" Freddy demanded.

"Found it" Craig replied. Freddy forced the glove off Craig's small hand and then placed it on the table.

"Okay. Rule number two, you will not bother me while I'm working. Rule number THREE, you will not cry, or whine, or laugh, or giggle, or sneeze or barf or FART! So no annoying sounds, alright?" Freddy said.

"Does this count as annoying?" Damien asked before tapping on his cheeks and making clicking noises with his tongue. Freddy grabbed Damien's wrists and got into his face.

"VERY" he growled and then moaned. The burnt man got up and left the kitchen.

"I will be seeing you three in six hours" Freddy said before closing the kitchen door. Clyde looked to Damien and Craig to cheer them up.

"Okay. Cheer up you two. Everything is going to be alright. We're gonna be really happy here" Craig nodded in sarcasm.

"Damien?" asked Clyde when discovering that he wasn't by his side. They turned around to see that Damien was eating out of the dog bowl of candy like a dog. He turned around to speak.

"Did you say something?" asked Damien with skittles and chocolate surrounding his lips. Clyde and Craig just face-palmed themselves and moaned like Freddy did a while ago with a moan following it.

**A/N: How was it? Also, the glove Craig was wearing is a reference to the glove that Freddy wore in 'Wes Craven's New Nightmare'. And the song on Ghostface's ring tone is the Cover Corp. cover of 'Somebody's Watching Me'. Lot's more to come in the next update. Please review, thanks!**


End file.
